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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29424099">The Two Times Sirius Tried To Leave (And The One Time He Did)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SimplyTaboo/pseuds/SimplyTaboo'>SimplyTaboo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anal Sex, Come as Lube, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Emotional Manipulation, Hand Jobs, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Men Crying, Oral Sex, Rimming, Sibling Incest, Spit As Lube</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 12:56:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,561</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29424099</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SimplyTaboo/pseuds/SimplyTaboo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“I won’t tell them.”</p><p>“You won’t tell them, no, but they’ll get it out of you, Reg,” Sirius said, his voice a little softer, losing some of that familial bite. He tried to hold that back around Regulus when he could, because he had to. Because Regulus was his little brother, because he was supposed to protect him even if he was shit at it most of the time. Because Regulus didn’t have any of that snap and snarl in him. </p><p>“I’ll keep them out of it.”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sirius Black/Regulus Black</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>59</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Two Times Sirius Tried To Leave (And The One Time He Did)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The first time Sirius Black tried to leave Grimmauld Place for good, it was the summer before his sixth year at Hogwarts. The tensions in the Wizarding World were high, and climbing higher, and a combination of pressures from his parents and his cousin had made life in that house more torturous than it had ever been. He’d never particularly gotten on with his parents, not since long before he was sorted into Gryffindor house and befriended “blood-traitors and mutts,” as they put it. But, on that night, with Walburga hoarse from shouting at him and Orion content with the black eye he’d left on his eldest son, Sirius had decided he’d had enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was frantically shoving clothes into his enchanted rucksack, trying to fit as many of his essentials into the damned thing. He had a vague idea of where he would go, what he would do, and exactly how he was going to apologize to the Potters for tumbling out of the floo at nearly midnight. He just needed to get out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The door to his room opened near silently, and he whirled around, wand bared expecting to see his father insistent on round two that he was not going to stand for. But the figure that occupied his doorway was slim, sallow-skinned, wide brown eyes looking up at him with more expression that Sirius was used to seeing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Regulus very rarely looked helpless. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Merlin’s nuts, I almost hexed you,” he said, turning back to shoving things into his bag. Regulus was quiet as he stepped into his older brother’s room and closed the door behind him, muttering something to Kreacher who undoubtedly was behind the door. He heart the hum of a silencing charm, that wild, familiar magic of House Elves and spared his brother a confused look before moving to grab his belongings off the book shelf. “What’s got you on, then?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where are you going?” Regulus asked simply, taking those eerily silent steps over to Sirius’ bed, sitting gingerly on the mattress. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can’t really tell you that, can I? They’ll get it out of you,” he said simply, grabbing knick knacks and books and shoving them in the bag with little regard to where they went. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I won’t tell them,” Regulus said, sounding just a little hurt. Sirius let out a sigh, running his hands through his messy, long hair before finally stopping the flurry of motion to look over at his brother. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You won’t tell them, no, but they’ll get it out of you, Reg,” he said, his voice a little softer, losing some of that familial bite. He tried to hold that back around Regulus when he could, because he had to. Because Regulus was his little brother, because he was supposed to protect him even if he was shit at it most of the time. Because Regulus didn’t have any of that snap and snarl in him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll keep them out of it,” he argued, holding his jaw out and squaring his narrow shoulder. When he did things like that, Sirius could actually see the similarities in their features, could see the way Regulus got that same stubborn point in his jaw, the same way the hollows of his cheeks went sharp and scary when he clenched his teeth. But those eyes, dark brown and unreadable were glistening a little too wet compared to his stoney gray, and the circles under his eyes were the deep blue of stress as opposed to his red from rage. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius sighed, moving to sit next to him, noticing for the first time in a long time how similar they were. Regulus was nearly the same height as him now, and if it weren't for the siney muscle Sirius had on his thin build from Quidditch, they'd both be the same willow build. The silence stretched between them, and Sirius just fell back against the mattress. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You can't," he said, stretching lazily. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I can," Regulus insisted. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <b>I</b>
  <span> can't even keep father out," Sirius said, dismissively. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I </span>
  <b>can.</b>
  <span>" Sirius wasn't looking, and startled when suddenly Regulus climbed into his lap, hands on either side of Sirius's face. He was so determined, staring down with those dark eyes that stood out against his pallor, too close. Sirius felt shame well in the pit of his stomach, willed his hands to stay still because the warmth of Regulus in his lap felt better than it had a right to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But his brother, his too observant, quiet brother saw the change in his eyes, saw the soft flush in his cheeks. Sirius didn't stop him when he shifted his hips over his lap in a way a brother never should, didn't stop him when he leaned down and closed the distance between their lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And it felt so good, so extremely good, that Sirius couldn't resist kissing him back, couldn't resist bringing his hands to grasp at Regulus' thick wavy hair and pulling him closer. Regulus whimpered into his mouth, and that was too damn good, so Sirius had to rock his hips against the curve of Regulus's ass, had to grind into the friction of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That's how they stayed for a few minutes, kissing and gasping against one another, Sirius felt dizzy the whole time. Regulus got bolder, one hand trailing down Sirius' body to slip into his trousers. A growl escaped the older boy as long, cool fingers wrapped around his hard cock, working it over with firm, sure strokes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Please," Regulus moaned softly into his mouth, and it made Sirius nip at his lips, rocking into his hand. "Please, Sirius, don't leave."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I won't," he gasped, head falling back against the sheets as he came, bucking into his brother's hand. "I won't leave."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he didn't. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Regulus was moaning so loud Sirius wondered if Kreacher's silencing spell would hold. It made him thrust harder, fucking into the tight, wet heat of his brother more fervently. He pressed them both to the mattress, shoving Regulus' chest down, growling as he wrapped one hand around narrow hips and the other clasped over his mouth as he cried out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sirius," Regulus whimpered, muffled by Sirius' fingers. Sirius wrenched his eyes shut like hearing it pained him, thrusting so hard into Regulus he could hear the mattress complain, could hear the ancient floorboards creak. "I'm so close-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius slipped two fingers into his mouth to keep him quiet, pressing along the slick heat of his tongue. He violated his mouth in a lewd mockery of the way he rocked his hips, working his cock into him. Regulus whined, wanton and hot as he let Sirius slip fingers along his tongue, wet and needy, letting those long fingers work to the edge of his throat and made him choke, made him shudder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius scented the back of Regulus's neck, smelling like sweat and sex and family, and it made something inside him clench and flip. His other hand slipped around a bruised, narrow hip, long fingers finding Regulus cock, griping it near brutally to work it over. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius was never like this, never wanted to fuck someone until they ached or bled, hell, he never wanted to be on the giving end. Regulus was tight and slick around him, and something dark in his mind wondered if this is what Peter and Remus felt when they fucked him, wondered if it was a family trait. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shame mixed with pure pleasure as Regulus moaned for him, his cock twitching in Sirius' fingers, spilling over them as he clenched so tight. "I love you, I love you," he whined, shuddering as he rode it out, gagging on his words around Sirius' fingers. "Tell me you love me, say you love me," he begged.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I love you," Sirius growled back, because he did. It hurt so much, loving his quiet, intelligent brother, loving the boy who couldn't strike the house elf and couldn't snarl at the wind like the rest of his family. It hurt as he fucked him through his orgasm like a desperate animal, feeling like he was destroying a masterpiece, tainting something beautiful and he couldn't get enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius came with a sob, thrusts erratic, so hard he knew it had to hurt, but Regulus just shuddered with him. He crashed back into himself panting, pressing his brother into the wet mess he'd created, still buried inside him to the hilt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything in his body was telling him to pull out, to scourgify his skin until it was raw, to wash the clinging sin of the Nobel House of Black off of his skin. Instead he just moved his hips softly, shallow thrusts, feeling his come leak out around his cock. He was still hard, and the tight, hot, over-slick wasn't something he could deny himself. Regulus whimpered, body twitching and oversensitive, and Sirius pressed a soft kiss against the back of his neck. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius still felt the split of his lip from where his father had struck him, felt the ache where the spell had hit his ribs. He still felt rage down to the pit of his stomach, bitterness that made him snap his hips, cruel, into Regulus.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And his younger brother just whimpered for him, arched his hips to keep his used hole open for him, and muttered, "Stay with me."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What are you doing?" Regulus asked, bleary as Sirius crawled into his bed. Nothing had happened that night, dinner was silent and Orion and Walburga had left after for a social call. There was a thunderstorm, but that was par for the course. It was well after midnight, and Sirius slipped under the covers of Regulus's bed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The younger boy frowned in the dark, reaching for the lamp when one of Sirius' hands came to stop him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No, leave the light off," he said, his voice gravelly and low as he bent to press his lips to the stripe of skin between Regulus' bottoms and his shirt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The light stayed off as Sirius worked Regulus' pajama bottoms down, stayed off when he took his brother's soft cock into his mouth and suckled and worked at it until it was hard. Regulus felt his breath catch as Sirius worked his mouth over him, absently clamping his own hand over his mouth to muffle the sounds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius pulled off, pushing the covers from over him, looking up at Regulus in the darkness. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You don't have to be quiet," he said, dragging his tongue over the velvety skin of his brother's cock. "They're not home." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius shifted them, sitting up on his knees and lifting Regulus' hips to his mouth, swallowing him down with a groan. He couldn't deny how intoxicating it was, the way Regulus trembled for him, the way he moaned loud since he could, the way his long pale hands moved to grip at Sirius' hair, gentle and reverent but insistent.  Sirius didn't tease, just took him into his throat, swirling his tongue because he wanted to, because it felt good to hear his brother moan. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It didn't take long under Sirius’ skilled tongue for Regulus to be trembling, letting out such vulgar noises that Sirius never thought possible. It was so wrong, but he wanted to bottle them up and hold them forever. The gentle hand in Sirius’ wavy black hair gripped a little tighter, splayed thighs shaking as Regulus fought to form words. “I’m….I’m so close…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Sirius didn’t slow down, just kept going, pushed his brother’s cock into his throat, felt the stretch of it as he swallowed around it. Regulus arched against the bed, eyes squeezed shut and crying out Sirius’ name as he came, stomach clenching and body shaking. Sirius kept the bitter taste on his tongue, didn’t swallow it like he usually did, and when he pulled his lips from Regulus’ wet cock, he lifted the boy’s hips higher and smeared it over his hole with his tongue. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Regulus mewled as Sirius brought two fingers to him, worked them inside using his own come as lube, worked him open enough to slide his tongue inside. It was filthy, just like what they were doing, and Regulus had never wanted anything more in his life. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, Sirius, I need it,” he gasped, trying to goad his brother into fucking him properly, but instead Sirius took his time. He lavished in it, spreading him open with his fingers and tongue, slicked with spit and his own come until he was trembling again, so pliant Sirius could work a third finger into him, kept going until Regulus was so desperate for it he sounded like he was near tears. “Please,” he gasped again, and Sirius finally lifted his mouth from his wet, twitching hole to look at him through the darkness. “Please, fuck me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lightening illuminated the darkness for a moment, painting the picture in the vibrant colors, the red of Sirius’ lips, the flush against his pale cheeks, the blown-out, hungry look in his grey eyes. Regulus took another shuddering breath, and Sirius turned to press a wet, messy kiss against the inside of his thigh. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t flip him over, didn’t press his face into the mattress like the times before. Instead he pressed pale thighs open, calves resting on his strong shoulders and crawled over him. Regulus let his hands move to grab at Sirius’ ribs, his back, something to prove to himself that this was real. But Sirius pressed their foreheads together, breathing the same air as he pushed his cock into him, hissing at the velvety warmth as he buried himself slowly, inch by inch, into the tightness of Regulus. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He rocked his hips gently, savoring every thrust, and it made Regulus tremble, whimpering as that deep scrape against the most intimate parts of his body steadily and slowly and so good. His cock was hard again as Sirius fucked him, and when the tempo increased with the booming sound of thunder outside, he didn’t stop himself from crying out his brother’s name. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Neither of them knew who tangled their hands together, who opened their eyes to watch flush and pleasure and shame spread over each other's cheeks. Sirius’ hips snapped into Regulus now, lost in the sea of it, and Regulus felt over-stimulated already, close to the edge again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m so close,” he whined and Sirius groaned as he pressed their lips together, open mouthed and hot. Regulus came like that, their mouths pressed together as he clenched around Sirius’ cock as he was fucked until he was a boneless mess. Sirius moaned against his lips as that clench worked him over too, spilling inside Regulus with a groan that was muffled by the raging thunder outside. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They didn’t speak after, just breathing the same air, wrapped around one another. Even after Sirius pulled out and wrapped his arms around his brother, holding him in the creaky, old mattress of his room, neither of them dared to speak.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Regulus pretended he didn’t know what this was, and he let himself drift into a blissful sleep pressed into his brother’s chest. He pretended he didn’t know what to expect, pretended he didn’t know that when he woke in the morning Sirius would be gone. But he knew he would wake in a house where he was truly alone with just his parents. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he did.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>There was no excuse for this except for pain and porn.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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